20. Ray Dalio – Billionaire, Author, Principles.
– If you can get past your ego barrier and you can get past your blind spot barrier, you can accomplish anything because you also know you don’t have to figure it out yourself. You can take in from other people the different ways to approach things in the best possible way.
Almost always or quite often, the first order consequences of things like it feels good, it makes me happy, I don’t wanna argue, I don’t wanna deal with the challenges, I wanna avoid the pain, that whole litany of things that you would say, Ah, that’s gonna bring you a happy life kind of thing.
The second order consequences are more often the opposite than the first order consequences. I mean, I don’t know the foods you eat, the ones that taste good are probably the ones, they aren’t the ones that you should be eating. So now when you start to realize that life is almost a trick, okay, are you gonna go for the first order consequences or the second order consequences?
Okay, I’m like sitting on one side of a jungle and that if I can get to the other side of the jungle safely, I’ll have a great life. But okay, but if I cross the jungle, all sorts of things is gonna happen. Now, what am I gonna choose? Am I gonna be on this side of the jungle and have just an ordinary life or am I gonna have what I think is the best life possible but ooh, I can get bitten all those things. And that’s just the nature of life. And then I said, ‘I have to.’ It’s my nature. I have to have the best life I can have. So, I’ve got to go into the jungle.
19. Lisa Nichols – Author, Entrepreneur, Motivational Speaker
– I’m in Inglewood, living off of Arbor Vitae. I’m on government assistance, and I run out of money, and I have to buy Pampers for Jelani. And I had $11.42 in the bank, and I remember wrapping my son in a towel for two days.
You know someone said, ’cause when I tell the story I always get teary-eyed. Someone said, “Do you fabricate the tears “’cause you’ve told the story so much?” No, I’m a mama. Every time I tell the story, I feel it again. I remember the second day, like you said, I had my hand on Jelani’s stomach, and I said, “Don’t worry baby, mommy will never be this broke, “or broken, again.” And that day, what shifted for me, was I was willing, and I don’t know if this is gonna sound crazy, I was willing to completely die to any form of me that I had been. So that I could birth the woman that I was becoming. The reason why a lot of people won’t become who they want is because they’re too attached to who they’ve been.
And you hear it all the time, when people say, “I’ve always been this way.” Okay, well, if that’s working for you, then keep doing that. I knew it wasn’t working for me any longer. I had hit my version of rock bottom. So, I was willing to let go of everything, and everybody. See, another reason why people won’t get there is because the door way is for you to fit through. You’re trying to carry everybody else through, ’cause you’re trying to be Rescue 911. And you gotta rescue you first.
I am much more valuable to my family, and to my community, because I was willing to let them go, go through the door myself. Teach myself, learn myself, condition myself, and then come back and get them. I’m much more valuable to them now. But I had to go through a window time of 10 years, of judgment. You leaving us, hanging out with white people all the time. You going to these crazy countries, we don’t know what I have to be willing to, to allow my conviction to make me inconvenienced.
See, we wanna grow but we wanna all stay liked by everybody. I was willing to be my own rescue at the risk of your approval. But most of us aren’t like that, Facebook is example we wanna be liked. Well, I woke up and I like myself today so your like is extra. My job is to like me first. I was willing to say everyday Lisa, you like you? Lisa, are you proud of you? Lisa are you playing fallout every day before I checked in with anybody else.
18. Sadhguru – Author, Indian Yogi
– Only when you’re in a pleasant state of experience your body and your brain works at its best. There’s no argument about that. There’s enough evidence to show that. So whatever impact or success or reaching goals or growth or whatever you say, on one level in the physical world, it’s about how well you harness your physiological and your psychological process, isn’t it? Whether your body and mind works against you, or works for you. This is a big difference.
So there is enough evidence to show only when you’re in pleasant levels of experience this happens best. So obviously joys first, then growth. If you’re joyful constantly and you have no fear of suffering because you understand all human experience comes from within you. And so you have managed to create the kind of experience that you want. Now growth is possible unbridled. If you have the fear of falling down and suffering, you will not go very high, isn’t it? See right now, what are the instruments of your experience? You know you’re here only because you can see, hear, smell, taste and touch. This is the only way you know that you’re here right now. Suppose you doze off. Don’t okay? Suppose you doze off. You don’t know that you’re here, isn’t it?
– Even though you’re here. Your heart is beating, everything is functioning. The world is on. We are all here. But you won’t know that you’re here, nor will you know that I’m here or anybody else is here. Isn’t it?
– All that’s happened is life is on full on even within you. Only thing is these five sensory organs have shut down. So your entire experience of life right now is happening because you can see hear, smell, taste and touch. Just look at the nature of the sensory organs. In the very nature, they’re outward bound, isn’t it? Can you roll your eyeballs inward and scan yourself?
Our nose is located right above our mouth. Suppose you don’t brush your teeth for three days. Though this nose is right here, it won’t tell you you have not brushed your teeth. The whole room will know you have not brushed your teeth but you will not know. This is the human predicament. It’s very easy to see what’s wrong with this guy, what’s wrong with her, what’s wrong with her. It takes a lot of observation to see what’s wrong with this. That level of keenness of observation is missing in most people, they need to cultivate that.
17. Mel Robbins – Best Selling Author
– When you set goals, when you have an intention on something that you want to change about your life, your brain helps you.
What it does is it opens up a checklist, and then your brain goes to work trying to remind you of that intention that you set. And it’s really important to develop the skill. And I say that word purposefully, the skill of knowing how to hear that inner wisdom and that intention kicking in and leaning into it quickly.
So for me, my brain saying that’s it, right there. Move as fast as a rocket Mel. I wanted to change my life. And I think most people that are miserable, or that are really like dying to be great and dying to have more, we wanna change. We wanna live a better life. We wanna create more for our families. We wanna be happier. The desire is there. Again, it’s about how do you go from knowledge to action. So the first thing in the story that’s important is realizing that the answer was in me. And my mind was telling me pay attention. Anyway, the next morning the alarm goes off, and I pretended NASA was there. It’s the stupidest story. I literally went five, four, three, two, one. I counted out loud and then I stood up.
And I’ll never forget standing there in my bedroom. It was dark. It was cold. It was winter in Boston. And for the first time in three months, I had beaten my habit of hitting the snooze button. I couldn’t believe it and I thought, wait a minute, counting backwards? That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life. Well the next morning, I used it again and it worked. The next morning I used it again and it worked. The next morning I used it again and it worked. And then I started to notice something really interesting. There were moments all day long, all day long, just like that five second moment in bed, where I knew knowledge, what I should do. And if I didn’t move within five seconds, my brain would step in and talk me out of it.
Every human being has a five second window, might even be shorter for you. You have about a five second window in which you can move from idea to action before your brain kicks into full gear, and sabotages any change in behavior.
Because remember your brain is wired to stop you from doing things that are uncomfortable or uncertain or scary. It’s your job to learn how to move from those ideas that could change everything into acting on them.
16. Peter Diamandis – Entrepreneur, Futurist
– You do what you need to do to make it happen and you pursue your dreams and education is like the most important thing you could possibly get.
I have a belief that every problem is solvable. As I think about the world we’re living in today, it’s the realization that we have solved so many problems to achieve this extraordinary world we live in today.
In terms of global production of food, of energy, of water, of information. We’re living in the world of Star Trek, I mean it’s, you think about that, that we can diagnose almost anything, I can read your genome for 100 bucks in a matter of a couple of hours. And understand all 3.2 billion letters of your life and have an AI analyze it and tell me about yourself, right? I can have one of these devices cob any piece of information talk to anyone on the planet. This is magic. This is crazy stuff. Just 20 years ago, let alone 100 years ago or 1,000 years ago. So, the realization is any problem is only a problem contextually today. And we’re gonna be creating the tools and knowledge to be able to solve that problem. And I believe that any problem not forbidden by the laws of Physics is solvable. And even then we’re gonna sort of learn where the boundaries of Physics truly are.
15. John Assaraf – Mindset & Brain Expert
– The law of GOYA is simply get off your ass. So if you think and you believe and you emotionalize, you visualize and you create your plan for how am I actually going to achieve this. So what do I need to do? When am I gonna do it? How specifically, how am I gonna tweak it, measure it and iterate it so that I’m consistently making progress.
I learned the value of progress versus perfection. None of my mentors ever had me focus on perfection. They had me focus on progress to just keep getting better, little incremental gains every day, every week, every month, every quarter. And even when you move backwards a couple of steps, what’s the progress that you made in what you learned?
So I was taught that failure is an opportunity to learn. And I was also taught to disassociate me being a failure from failing. When we feel something, chances are that we’re gonna release dopamine in the brain, the feel good neuro-chemical that activates the reward center of the brain. And chances are if we feel that, and we have this positive emotion around it, and that neuro chemistry is flooding our brain and our body with feel good chemicals, we’re actually activating the motivational center of the brain. And so when we visualize, when we set a goal, when we take an action step, when we emotionalize, when we read our goals, the initial flood of neuro-chemicals, dopamine, serotonin, feel good chemicals. And then if we share it with a friend, oxytocin, those three neuro-chemicals, those are the neuro-chemicals of goal achievement. But then there’s the other side of it, the other circuits of fear, of stress, where norepinephrine, cortisol or epinephrine, the stress hormones can be released as well.
And so I’m fascinated and I wanna teach people the stuff that we’ve learned about beliefs, self esteem, self worth, fears, and the stuff that really holds people back because all the how to, how to get healthy and stay healthy, we know. How do I build a business and sustain, we know. How do I get into relationship and make it successful, we know. We know most of the how to for anything that anybody wants to do in this timeframe that we live in. So the how to is the easiest part of the equation. So the harder part of the equation is why am I not doing the things that I know I should be doing? And why am I not doing the things that I could find out easily how to do?
14. Aubrey Marcus – Author, Entrepreneur, CEO Onnit
– Yeah, they make a differentiation between the person who’s the artist and kind of the canvas, you could say. You know so the artist is an artist painting the masterpiece of their life, they’re holding the brush. They decide how they wanna make themselves, forge themselves. They decide how they wanna express what they wanna be, or how they wanna interact with this incredible, school of life that we have available to us. And then the other side is those people who are just constantly getting paint splattered on them from other people, their parents telling, oh, you should be this, you should do this, or this is what you need to be. This is how you need to look, this is how you need to dress, this is what and they’re just receiving all of this external pressure from what the Toltecs would call the Mitote which is like a term for the marketplace where everybody’s shouting their expectations, their beliefs, their agreements, all the things that they have that kind of, we can either conform to or decide no, no, screw all that. I’m the artist, I will decide what I accept, maybe I agree with this perception. Maybe I disagree with this perception, but you take control of your life.
And the Nagul is a place of control where you’re shaping your own life with the power of your intent, with the power of your belief, with the power of choice and actual free will rather than being just kind of battered around by everything that society and people want you to be.
It’s funny, because if we were able to do like, even a fraction of the things we know we should, we would all be bad asses, but there’s so many things you talk to people, yeah, I should be doing that. Yeah, I should be doing, I know I should be meditating. Yeah, I know I should be doing this. I should be eating better. I should be doing this. We all know what we want to do to be the best version of ourselves, but for whatever reason, we don’t do it. And there’s a lot of reasons why but we’re not doing it. And so the ability to choose and actually decide what you’re gonna do to be the Nagul, to be the artist and say, oh well, if I believe I should meditate, then I’ll meditate and just collapsing that I know I should with actually doing it. That is a superpower.
That’s what defines the greatest performers from the people who haven’t quite made it yet is really their ability to say, oh, if I should train now I will. Oh if I should eat like this I will. Oh if I should do this, okay then I will. It’s collapsing that knowing what knowing what you should do, and actually doing it and making that one. And that’s ultimately a choice. We have the ability to tap into that superpower of choice, that superpower of free will. Not gonna be easy as the mind will play a billion different tricks and rationalizations and whatever. But ultimately, we are in control. You know, as I said, I’m not saying it’s easy. And I’m not saying it’s the best strategy. I think you got to be fair and say like, oh, I can’t do that. Well, if you can’t do that you use other methods. Do what you need to do to be effective, but know that you do have that power. We all have that power, we have the power to have the agency to make those types of choices.
13. Jesse Itzler – Author, Entrepreneur
– Once you get over the fear of being embarrassed, no one likes to be embarrassed. But once you get over being scared of being embarrassed, it’s super liberating. And it allows you to go into lanes that you otherwise you wouldn’t go into. And everybody is wired differently. Everybody’s wired completely different. It’s hard to rewire someone, to be comfortable taking risk, comfortable with being embarrassed. And I think it comes from having a lot of egg on your face. And learning along the way.
My partner and I were guests on a private jet when I was 27 or 28 years old. And when we walked onto the airplane, it was like the scene in “The Wizard of Oz” when everything goes from black and white to color like people fly like this. This is unbelievable, I wanna fly like this. And when by the time we landed, I was like let’s start a private jet company. You know like definitely so we could fly privately, except we have no airplanes. So we went to a company called NetJets owned by Warren Buffett, the 800 pound gorilla. They had 600 plus airplanes in the fleet, and pitched this idea for a 25 hour prepaid jet card, which was called Marquis jet.
But the meeting actually, when we pitched the idea, the meeting lasted 12 minutes, and they threw us out. And the president of NetJet said, and this is almost a direct quote, he said, cool idea, but if you think we’re gonna give two kids that didn’t break 1,000 on their SAP, which kinda pissed me off, I got like a 980 but I’ve convinced myself I’ve gotten over you’re like keep telling yourself you broke 1,000. He’s like I’m never giving you guys access to our airplanes, ’cause the notion was, if we could sell and market onto their fleet, through this 25 hour program called Marquis jet, that’s how we would piggyback off their airplanes and they threw us out in the meeting and then we were relentless. And we came back and we realized that we couldn’t sell this concept through a PowerPoint, because they’d see 1,000 PowerPoints a month.
So we literally brought our own focus group in to bring the meeting to life. And one by one, the guys stood up. We had Carl Banks from the New York Giants and Run from Run DMC and powerful real estate mogul. And they explained that they would never buy a fraction, what NetJet was selling, but they would buy a 25 hour card if it was offered. And that’s how we ended up solidifying the opportunity. And then to your point, when we started the company, this is back in 2000. So I had no sophisticated way to get leads. I didn’t know a lot of wealthy people. And the only way that I could really build my database or sell anybody was to go to events, where rich people hung out.
So I heard about this conference called The Ted. I didn’t even know what it was in Monterey, California. So I flew commercial, transfer three flights, drove six hours when I landed to get to Ted to try to pitch this idea to anyone that would listen. But when I got to The Ted conference, it was like Fort Knox, everybody had credentials, double credentials, and I had nothing. And they won’t let me anywhere near the venue. So I went to the local coffee shop and just tryna figure out how I’m gonna get in or sneak in or get someone to get me in or get access. And I realized like every hour to everyone with credentials, was walking into the coffee shop and they were buying lattes and muffins and lattes and muffins and lattes and muffins.
So the next morning, I woke up at five o’clock, and I went to the coffee shop and I bought every single muffin that they had, I took all the inventory out of the shop. I’m like, I’ll take all your muffins, they gave me like 80 muffins. And I was sitting and then when the first wave of Ted attendees broke for their break, and they came one of the customers said, oh, can I have a latte and a muffin and the guy said, well I could give you a latte, but we’re all out of muffins. And when he was walking out I said, excuse me, sir, look I happen to have an extra muffin, actually I have 800 of them, but if you want a muffin, you can have one of my muffins. He’s like no, get out of here. So then I realize it starts but what do you do? What are you doing here? And we started having a conversation and he said, do you mind if I join you and I, my only thought was like, you are qualified to buy a card, you can join me. And he was my first sale. He was my first sale. The guy owned a company that sold it to eBay. And that was the start of the adrenaline rush of okay, let me try to crack this code of how we can build this thing with not a big database.
12. Tim Ferriss – Best Selling Author
– If more information were the answer, we’d all be billionaires with six pack ads. That’s a good one, right? It’s just absorbing not even absorbing, just reading and watching and listening to more, isn’t enough like you have to apply it, you have to use incentives. You have to have rewards and punishments set for yourself to actually get things done timelines, et cetera. So that’s one.
Another one is, don’t be a donkey. There’s a philosopher’s paradox, but I don’t think it is. I think it’s just a parable about Burdains Ass, about a donkey who is thirsty and hungry, and there’s water on one side, few feet away and hay on the other. And he can’t decide whether to do the hay first, the hay first or the water, the hay or the water and he dies of thirst at the end of it. He couldn’t do them sequentially. In effect, you can do almost everything you want in life, but you can’t do it at the same time. And if you can just dedicate yourself to one thing for even a year and then the next thing for a year, you can do those 10 things. But if you try to do all 10 at once, you’re gonna be Burdains Ass. And you’re gonna go, should I do this, should I do this? Or should I focus on this, should I focus on this? So don’t be a donkey.
– Transformational education to me, is the most important type of education. The single most important type of education you want to invest in for yourself and that you want to put your children through. So, first let me define what that is, right? Transformational education covers the education that many of our institutions forgot to teach us.
It’s about wisdom. It’s about mindfulness. It’s about taking care of your body, your mind, your health, your emotional states, it’s about being a more conscious parent, being a more conscious lover. It’s about how to deal with those days when you might wake up one day feeling depressed or sad, and how do you deal with that? Schools don’t teach us that stuff. And here’s why transformation education is so important.
If you think about the human experience, what really matters is not so much your grades or the job that you have. All of these are mean scores. They are a means to an end, right? But if you ask a human being, to share with you the moments in life that they’re most grateful for, all of those small moments often deal with inner states. It’s falling in love. It’s carrying your first child in your arm.
It’s the joy of like accomplishing your first big win. And all of these are states of happiness, states of joy, states of human connectivity. Transformational education shows you how to get there faster without the dogma, without the unnecessary toiling towards a degree and then that job that society says you need. And then that career path, then breaking yourself working nine to five on something you hate. And the reason that’s so important is because the world is changing at an exponential rate.
Ray Kurzweil says that by 2029 on our smartphone, all of us will have the equivalent of personalized artificial intelligence. You can call it anything you want Rose, Jarvis, Nancy, whatever, but this AI will be able to run your life for you. All the knowledge that we are currently learning in school will be in our extended brain. And so what then should we be studying? Because history, geography, everything is gonna be on a personalized AI. So the most important thing to teach people is transformation. It’s to teach people how to expand their worldviews, to teach people how to know how to take care of their health, how to stay healthy, how to practice longevity practices, how to go within when they’re feeling sad, how to practice meditation and mindfulness. This is the most important education.
Stay tuned next week for PART 2 of 20 Mentors You Should Follow. 10-1